I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
