Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
