Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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