wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
