I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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