I only kidnapped one of them. chill
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
