I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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