I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
