i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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