Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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