Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
