I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize