I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
