I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Small penises have feelings too.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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