just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The struggles of a small town man whore
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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