Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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