I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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