U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
