you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
