Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
