this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
