I'm lost and stupid without you.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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