ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
