I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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