Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
