He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
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