I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
