Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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