they need to just BURY HIM!
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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