got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
