Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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