i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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