I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
