I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
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