Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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