I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize