Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
