Pants 0. Shit 1.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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