haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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