its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
