i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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