Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
