It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
two words...techno handjob
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
i think my cat just said my name.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
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