There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
