rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
