my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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