Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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