im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize