No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
