My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Did we literally take a cab across the street
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
